Courage is the mental strength to persevere and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty.

In order to understand courage we must first consider what fear is, and its origin. Fear is a strong, sometimes crippling emotion caused by the perception or anticipation of danger.

Fear is hardwired into our biology over eons to protect us from severe threats, danger, and possible death. These threats present themselves as ways that would cause death or severe injury such as: starvation, physical attacks, wild animals, exposure to elements, etc. Fear served us well for eons, for it kept us alive. That hesitation in the past often would have saved your life and was something valuable to heed.

Currently, in modern society, past fears regarding scarcity of basic needs are not as relevant. Food is easily obtained at the grocery store, and laws through law enforcement help ensure public safety. But, we still have this powerful emotion of warning biologically programmed into us, running in the background. 

Fear has evolved into another form known as anxiety.

Anxiety is uneasiness and apprehension about future uncertainties. It is also known to be persistent and ongoing. Anxiety also causes stress. Stress overtime generates great strain on the body and sometimes results not only in physical discomfort, but physical illness. Heart disease is the number one cause of death in the United States, and stress is a major contributing factor.

It’s easy to believe that anxiety is caused solely by external events or the behavior of others. But, anxiety actually arises from thoughts about a future with negative events happening. These thoughts are all created by your mind. When you’re anxious, you’re living in an imaginary future has not yet happened.

But wait, what about the things those people said or did to me?

Maybe it’s true that what was said to you or what was done was mean or unjust. But, you are the source of your feelings regarding what happened. You choose how you feel about it whether angry, vengeful, anxious, or nothing at all. True peace and understanding comes from realizing that you control your responses in the situation. This does not in any way dismiss how you’re feeling, or any wrong doing that occurred. It is meant to give you greater clarity so you can make better decisions for a just outcome for both parties.

Methods to understand anxiety or fears you may be experiencing:

Mindfullness:

Just knowing what makes you feel fearful or anxious is the first step in overcoming it. You may not know the trigger for your anxiety, or there may be many triggers every day. 

When you find yourself feeling fearful or anxious, try to find some space to examine your emotions. 

Ask yourself: What just happened, and what were my first thoughts before I started feeling this way? What am I feeling and why?

Your very first answer probably is a trigger(s), and is where you can begin developing a plan to manage or eliminate these negative feelings. 

Examining the situation:

Is the situation actually dangerous or life threatening? 

If it isn’t dangerous or physically life threatening, then you’re probably experiencing anxiety rather than fear. 

If you find the way a person is treating you or speaking to you is consistently triggering your anxiety, you may need talk to them to rectify the situation, or consider letting them go. If you find a place, like your work or living arrangements are causing you anxiety or stress, then it’s important to address that and make a plan to improve or change it.

In order to build up your self-confidence to help overcome anxiety and fears, you can set up small achievable goals. As you achieve to each of these goals it actually builds your self-esteem and confidence. And each of these goals can address a particular trigger you’ve uncovered. 

Overall it’s important to be patient with yourself as this is hard work, but you can do it. 

All it takes is that first step.